The Heavy

Telling these stories can be tricky. In my past posts, I’ve had permission to talk about a reading, or, I’ve been able to tell it vaguely enough that permission wasn’t necessary. This time around, I’m struggling. I did a reading a few months ago that was absolutely jaw dropping, even to me. And of course, those are the types of readings I want to share! But, BUT, this reading was with a friend of the deceased, not the family, AND there are some details to this reading that will make it more than slightly identifiable. Therein lies the problem. Can I write this in a way that everyone retains anonymity? But even moreso, why am I writing this? Is it just for the sensationalism? Just for the Ego? Would telling it serve a higher good than just the WOW factor?

For a while, I couldn’t answer that in a way that kept me satisfied, so I had resigned to keep this one to myself. I could just tell it to friends, knowing it would stay in that circle. At least it wouldn’t be out on the internet!

Well, Spirit has another idea. It has me waking up to thinking about this, it puts it in my head at random times throughout my day… and I think I’ve finally figured out why I need to keep writing this out. To be honest, I’m going to let Spirit guide this one as much as possible, because my Holly brain is still wondering if I’m doing right…

Like always with these sorts of posts, I am not only changing names this time, but I will probably be wishy washy on relationships, too. My first and foremost responsibility is that the family in this scenario cannot be identified, nor can they identify themselves. It is not up to me (or any medium for that matter) to force an event like this on to someone. If the family is meant to hear from this gentleman, they will seek it out, or he will figure out a way. It is not for them to stumble across with google.

I have a friend. Let’s call her “Sandy”. And Sandy has a friend that we shall call “Raven.” Sandy called me one day and said, “you have GOT to read Raven.” Sandy wasn’t going to give me any details, she was just convinced this reading needed to happen.

Raven met with me on a random evening. I had had a busy day and to be honest, may have had a little bit of the ‘party trick” feeling going… like maybe Raven didn’t really NEED a reading, that I was just being trotted out for a bit of ouija board-ish fun, if you will. I also hadn’t done a reading in a couple weeks, so I was feeling “crusty” to say the least. So, I decided to excuse myself for a few minutes to make sure I could quiet my thoughts and get into the zone without prying eyes.

Immediately as I sat alone, I felt this sense of HEAVY. It was as if the air was just pushing down on my shoulders. I knew this was a male, and I knew this male was around the same age as Raven. I didn’t wait for any more information to flow before I went back to Raven and started talking.

“I just feel like its SO HEAVY,” I said, as I pulled my hands down to my shoulders.

“Yep” Raven replied.

(For clarity, Raven and I never had the discussion of who he was. She just knew exactly who I was talking about from the get go. I started talking about “him” and neither of us ever questioned it. For ease of telling this story, let’s also give him a name. I’ll call him “Seth.”)

The heavy continued, and I associated this feeling as a sign of depression. I mean, That’s how sadness usually comes through in readings for me… Life feels heavy! So, I asked Raven, “Was he depressed?”

“I don’t think so…” she replied, confused.

I felt “the heavy” again. There was more that Seth wanted to say about this. And yet every time I would go back to it, my “Holly brain” was looking for the emotional answer… the depression. And, of course, Seth kindly played along…

Seth talked a lot about his family. He made sure Raven knew he trusted her completely with them, and hoped in the future she would be open to giving emotional support to his sibling. THAT was who he was really worried about.

I asked Raven if Seth had been coming to her in her dreams as he was showing me. “Yes! I have had so many dreams where he comes and he just keeps saying ‘I’m ok! I’m ok!’”

Seth then started to talk about his belongings, and I knew it had something to do with how they all got ‘divided up’; that there was something he wanted Raven to have. I asked her if Seth would have been the type to keep a journal.. she wasn’t aware if he did. He told me to tell her that if she was able to read his journal that she would understand him more. And then again, I felt the heavy feeling.

There was much more to this reading, lots of love and information, and it went as well as it could have. But, at the end, after I thought I had wrapped things up with Seth, I just couldn’t shake this nagging question I had… “How did you die!?” Now to be clear, I would usually NEVER ask this. Although, it IS something a lot of other mediums DO mention (as it provides a strong piece of evidence,) it doesn’t usually work for me that way. But this time, I just couldn’t shake it. It’s almost as if Seth wanted me to ask. So ask I did. I looked up to where Seth’s energy was as if I was trying to solve a puzzle- “What happened to you!?”

Immediately Seth showed me himself laying down with loved ones coming to his side to say goodbye. I actually felt it from his perspective, laying down, and I could see people coming to me. This was also with the knowledge that he was like this for about three days.

Processing this in my Holly brain, I asked Raven, “Was he in the hospital before he died?” Raven looked confused. “I see him laying down for three days with everyone coming to say goodbye.”

Raven replied, “No, but I can understand why you’d say that.”

At this point, I clearly wasn’t getting what Seth was putting down. If you are laying down somewhere with people coming to say goodbye, and it’s NOT the hospital…. HUH?

“He died in the Surfside building collapse in Florida,” Raven told me.


I still get chills when I say it. Seth had been showing me exactly what had happened to him the whole time.


Now, here’s where I should mention, A) the number one rule of Mediumship is to do no harm. So, if I had known that “laying there for three days” would correspond to being buried under the rubble I would have never repeated it. Yet B) I also think this is why I’m supposed to tell this story. Yes, the three days thing seems like a horrible detail. But, it wasn’t given to me that way at all. In fact, remember how I mentioned Seth showed it to me from his perspective? Well, I felt nothing but peace laying there. He KNEW people were there and sending him love. And it was why Seth kept coming to Raven in her dreams- to make sure she KNEW he was OK, despite departing in such a seemingly tragic way.

I know I’ve done a post before about “suffering,” but clearly we all need to be reminded of this. Our loved ones who have passed have also moved on from their passing! Lately, I’ve been likening it to childbirth. Many of us have been through some SERIOUS pain birthing children. And some of us for multiple days even! But months later, can you imagine having anguish about the childbirth pain someone went through? “Oh Krista, your baby is beautiful but my goodness,” sobbing “I am SOOO sorry about the horrible labor pains and the episiotomy!” Krista would be like, “I’m fine! I mean yeah it sucked for a minute but its all good now!”

That is EXACTLY what its like for those on the other side. The act of death, and especially the physical pain of death, means nothing because THEY ARE FINE NOW.


Lastly, remember where Seth talked about keeping a journal? Well, about a week after this reading, Raven got a call from Seth’s sibling, who out of the blue told Raven that they had found Seth’s journal and that she was welcome to read it.

16 thoughts on “The Heavy

  1. Such a privilege to have this phenomenal gift. I’m so grateful you share these stories with us. I love, love, love reading about your experiences.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thanks for sharing this story, Holly! Love reading them and love that you have not only this amazing gift but that you can also eloquently write about the experiences in a thoughtful (with sprinkles of humor) manner! ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

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